Ok so i am in class at the moment and i have the worst case of sleepy tierdness in the world... this so so sucks and i also have the worst keyboard in class... dammit i willcontiune this after class when i get home and nap for a wile...
LILMAN X
Monday, January 31, 2005
Sunday, January 30, 2005
Slumber of the 5
Well so yet agen I cant sleep... dammit why do I have this insomniac so bad I don't know...W/E cant do shit about it but just stay up until I am sleepy and pass out... I only have 5 Hrs to sleep until I wake up I am sure by the time I go to sleep it will be 4... Katia wants to go to the beach 2marrow, its kinda too cool out to be going but hey what the hell why not... As long as I get to chill with her I am happy.. So I had a good day, didn't do much just chill at home and relax then go out with the guys witch was cool. Saw Julian, (from the hood) and hanged out at terrells house and then just chilled... Talked to a friend of mine from way east, so I was glad talking to her. It makes my day when I get a chance to talk to her, she's so cool, calm, and collective. Too bad she is not down here, but I know once she comes down for the summer we will hang... I hope... So anyways my eyes are dry, and I cant sleep... So I am going to attempt to sleep... Tonight's song is ... Common- The light
LILMAN X
Common- The Light
Yeah..Doo-doo-doo, mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm..Doo-doo-d-doo, diggy-doo YO..I never knew a luh, luh-luh, a love like this Gotta be somethin for me to write this Queen, I ain't seen you in a minuteWrote this letter, and finally decide to send it Signed sealed delivered for us to grow together Love has no limit, let's spend it slow foreverI know your heart is weathered by what studs did to youI ain't gon' assault em cause I probably did it too Because of you, feelings I handle with careSome niggaz recognize the light but they can't handle the glare You know I ain't the type to walk around with matchin shirtsIf relationship is effort I will match your work I wanna be the one to make you happiest, it hurts you the mostThey say the end is near, it's important that we close.... to the most, high Regardless of what happen on him let's rely There are times.. when you'll need someone..I will be by your side..There is a light, that shines,special for you, and me..Yo, yo, check it It's important, we communicate and tune the fate of this union, to the right pitch I never call you my bitch or even my booThere's so much in a name and so much more in you.Few understand the union of woman and man And sex and a tingle is where they assume that it landBut that's fly by night for you and the sky I write For in these cold Chi night's moon, you my light If heaven had a height, you would be that tall Ghetto to coffee shop, through you I see that all Let's stick to understandin and we won't fall For better or worse times, I hope to me you call So I pray everyday more than anything friends will stay as we begin to laythis foundation for a family - love ain't simpleWhy can't it be anything worth having you work at annuallyGranted we known each other for some timeIt don't take a whole day to recognize sunshine
There are times.. when you'll need someone..I will be by your side, oh darlingThere is a light, that shines, special for you, and me..Yeah.. yo, yo, check itI t's kinda fresh you listen to more than hip-hopand I can catch you in the mix from beauty to thrift shopPlus you ship hop when it's time to, thinkin you fresh Suggestin beats I should rhyme to At times when I'm lost I try to find youYou know to give me space when it's time to My heart's dictionary defines you, it's love and happinessTruthfully it's hard tryin to practice abstinenceThe time we committed love it was real good Had to be for me to arrive and it still feel goodI know the sex ain't gon' keep you, but as my equalit's how I must treat you As my reflection in light I'ma lead youAnd whatever's right, I'ma feed you ..Digga-da, digga-da, digga-da, digga-digga-da-daYo I tell you the rest when I see you, peace...
There are times.. when you'll need someone..I will be by your side..There is a light, that shines, special for you, and me..(I'll) take my chances.. before they pass.... pass me by, oh darling..You need to look at the other side..You'll agree..
LILMAN X
Common- The Light
Yeah..Doo-doo-doo, mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm..Doo-doo-d-doo, diggy-doo YO..I never knew a luh, luh-luh, a love like this Gotta be somethin for me to write this Queen, I ain't seen you in a minuteWrote this letter, and finally decide to send it Signed sealed delivered for us to grow together Love has no limit, let's spend it slow foreverI know your heart is weathered by what studs did to youI ain't gon' assault em cause I probably did it too Because of you, feelings I handle with careSome niggaz recognize the light but they can't handle the glare You know I ain't the type to walk around with matchin shirtsIf relationship is effort I will match your work I wanna be the one to make you happiest, it hurts you the mostThey say the end is near, it's important that we close.... to the most, high Regardless of what happen on him let's rely There are times.. when you'll need someone..I will be by your side..There is a light, that shines,special for you, and me..Yo, yo, check it It's important, we communicate and tune the fate of this union, to the right pitch I never call you my bitch or even my booThere's so much in a name and so much more in you.Few understand the union of woman and man And sex and a tingle is where they assume that it landBut that's fly by night for you and the sky I write For in these cold Chi night's moon, you my light If heaven had a height, you would be that tall Ghetto to coffee shop, through you I see that all Let's stick to understandin and we won't fall For better or worse times, I hope to me you call So I pray everyday more than anything friends will stay as we begin to laythis foundation for a family - love ain't simpleWhy can't it be anything worth having you work at annuallyGranted we known each other for some timeIt don't take a whole day to recognize sunshine
There are times.. when you'll need someone..I will be by your side, oh darlingThere is a light, that shines, special for you, and me..Yeah.. yo, yo, check itI t's kinda fresh you listen to more than hip-hopand I can catch you in the mix from beauty to thrift shopPlus you ship hop when it's time to, thinkin you fresh Suggestin beats I should rhyme to At times when I'm lost I try to find youYou know to give me space when it's time to My heart's dictionary defines you, it's love and happinessTruthfully it's hard tryin to practice abstinenceThe time we committed love it was real good Had to be for me to arrive and it still feel goodI know the sex ain't gon' keep you, but as my equalit's how I must treat you As my reflection in light I'ma lead youAnd whatever's right, I'ma feed you ..Digga-da, digga-da, digga-da, digga-digga-da-daYo I tell you the rest when I see you, peace...
There are times.. when you'll need someone..I will be by your side..There is a light, that shines, special for you, and me..(I'll) take my chances.. before they pass.... pass me by, oh darling..You need to look at the other side..You'll agree..
Saturday, January 29, 2005
I'm having trouble trying to sleep (GREEN DAY-Brain Stew)
>_< <~~~ Screwy day....
So my day was a long, and tiering one... Class was today, This was the friday when i was suposed to go to class, the make up day that my teacher screwd up last time. So w/e class as usal, bla bla bla linux and more usless stuff that will be outdated soon i am sure. then after i left to go hang with katia, she wanted to go shoping and do stuff since she was board and off and had nothing to do, nah j/k i am sure she just wanted to hang out so it was cool, we shoped, i picked out some stuff for her but she didnt like it because she is not a 100% girly girl... your typical miami girl if you know what i mean, so we compromised on jeans and she got it because it looked good and she knew she could not resist my taste... lol nah it was good on her so she got-em. So then after that it was about 4 so we jetted to her house to chill ( me fix problems on her pc and be abused by her picking at my face {long story} wile i scream) and see E.R. and hang... So we installed lisure sute larry and stuff so we ( I ) were a little too much into the game so we kinda lotst track of time so i got home like at 9 when i should of been home earlyer because i was tierd but w/e. I was also enjoying myself when we were driving, jamming to my music in the car, mostly it was greenday and one prodigy song, but it was fun blasting the music. So now its like 4AM, i cant sleep, i dont know why but w/e i am going to watch E.R. and atempt to sleep so here is somthing to go by.... NIGHT NIGHT
LILMAN X
(GREEN DAY-Brain Stew)
I'm having trouble trying to sleep
I'm counting sheep but running out
As time ticks by
And still I try
No rest for crosstops in my mind
On my own... here we go
My eyes feel like they're gonna bleed
Dried up and bulging out my skull
My mouth is dry
My face is numb
fucked up and spun out in my room
On my own... here we go
My mind is set on overdrive
The clock is laughing in my face
A crooked spine
My sense's dulled
Passed the point of delerium
On my own... here we go
My eyes feel like they're gonna bleed
Dried up and bulging out my skull
My mouth is dry
My face is numb
fucked up and spun out in my room
On my own... here we go
So my day was a long, and tiering one... Class was today, This was the friday when i was suposed to go to class, the make up day that my teacher screwd up last time. So w/e class as usal, bla bla bla linux and more usless stuff that will be outdated soon i am sure. then after i left to go hang with katia, she wanted to go shoping and do stuff since she was board and off and had nothing to do, nah j/k i am sure she just wanted to hang out so it was cool, we shoped, i picked out some stuff for her but she didnt like it because she is not a 100% girly girl... your typical miami girl if you know what i mean, so we compromised on jeans and she got it because it looked good and she knew she could not resist my taste... lol nah it was good on her so she got-em. So then after that it was about 4 so we jetted to her house to chill ( me fix problems on her pc and be abused by her picking at my face {long story} wile i scream) and see E.R. and hang... So we installed lisure sute larry and stuff so we ( I ) were a little too much into the game so we kinda lotst track of time so i got home like at 9 when i should of been home earlyer because i was tierd but w/e. I was also enjoying myself when we were driving, jamming to my music in the car, mostly it was greenday and one prodigy song, but it was fun blasting the music. So now its like 4AM, i cant sleep, i dont know why but w/e i am going to watch E.R. and atempt to sleep so here is somthing to go by.... NIGHT NIGHT
LILMAN X
(GREEN DAY-Brain Stew)
I'm having trouble trying to sleep
I'm counting sheep but running out
As time ticks by
And still I try
No rest for crosstops in my mind
On my own... here we go
My eyes feel like they're gonna bleed
Dried up and bulging out my skull
My mouth is dry
My face is numb
fucked up and spun out in my room
On my own... here we go
My mind is set on overdrive
The clock is laughing in my face
A crooked spine
My sense's dulled
Passed the point of delerium
On my own... here we go
My eyes feel like they're gonna bleed
Dried up and bulging out my skull
My mouth is dry
My face is numb
fucked up and spun out in my room
On my own... here we go
Friday, January 21, 2005
Death to the stupid one... (shampo voice) I KILL VINCENT
It was 7 am... A nice day and time to wake up... Took a long nice shower, Relaxed, then off to school... Walked inside... AND THERE WAS NO FUCKING SCHOOL! My stupid dum ass teacher who is a frekan Idiot told me to go to class today because monday was a holaday... Well the make up day is not till next week friday... I want to kill him i got up for nothing early this morening.... I HATE GETTING UP EARLY~! Well i am going to go take care of some stuff since i am up early for no reason.... damm the day... i am going to make somthing better out of it....
LILMAN X
LILMAN X
Death to the stupid one... (shampo voice) I KILL VINCENT
It was 7 am... A nice day and time to wake up... Took a long nice shower, Relaxed, then off to school... Walked inside... AND THERE WAS NO FUCKING SCHOOL! My stupid dum ass teacher who is a frekan Idiot told me to go to class today because monday was a holaday... Well the make up day is not till next week friday... I want to kill him i got up for nothing early this morening.... I HATE GETTING UP EARLY~! Well i am going to go take care of some stuff since i am up early for no reason.... damm the day... i am going to make somthing better out of it....
LILMAN X
LILMAN X
Thursday, January 20, 2005
If I could have just a moment of you {} would I be wanting more? {} If I could have a taste of you {} would I be addicted? {} If I could have just A..
Thinking, sitting, playing, hopeing, wishing, wondering, thinking some more, and waiting.... Well so my thoughts the last few days have been about a girl mostly that I care dear for but I wonder what the out come would of been different if I would of instigated something rather than just sit back and take no action.... So as I am lisening to this song titled Lorna Vallings - Taste, The lyrics hit me to think what it could be like or what would of been... Who knows even if I would of had a chance, maybe I am making all this hard thinking in for nothing anyways... But I will never know for sure.... All I can do is think about what could of been or what could be or what can be or what could of never been or what will never be... None of I know... I don't know what to tell you, sometimes I look at her and I just feel like giving her a hug and kissing her and holding her tight close to me, were no bad can happen, no one can hurt or harm her, and I will protect her to my best ability. All I can do now is sit here on the bench and watch the game until its my turn to play, if the game is not over by the time its my turn... Well so the dreaded holiday is coming up soon V-day... AKA Valentine's Day. Yet another year that I am alone and cursed and screwed with no one... Oh well fuck it, time to just kick back and blow shit up in the game world... Halo,CS, vice-city and maxpayne... My opinion in my view is a Cretan person who is currently with this girl is doing a shitty or shabby job of protecting, helping, and a decent job of careing for her... But hey I cant be counted on because I guess what I cant see I cant judge. I would rather not know or see what happends with them but I do ask time to time just because I care for her and I don't want to see her hurt. I find it funny because I ask and she thinks its because I make fun of her or I hate him... im not sure of why she gets that idea but it sure is funny at times... Well I am going to kick it back for a few days of gaming and hanging with the guys... BTW the lyrics to the song..
LILMAN X
Lorna Vallings - Taste
If I could have just a moment of you
Would I be wanting more?
If I could have just a taste of you
Would I be addicted?
If I could have just a touch of you
Could I tear myself away?
I would pray to be the rain that runs over and in your skin
With no consequence
To be the liquid in your glass that falls around your lips and mouth
Swallow me
If I could have just a breath of you
Would you, could you infect me?
If I could have just a view of you
Would you leave your door ajar?
If I could have just a part of you
Let me drink of your tides
I would pray to be the rain that runs over and in your skin
With no consequence
To be the liquid in your glass that falls around your lips and mouth
Swallow me
And after would the silence thicken, stiffen?
Would I run home in the dark with something stolen?
Would you be slinking in my conscience, laughing?
Would this hunger ever cease?
You are the cliff that I'm walking
Lord help me if I fall
Are you more than my hunger?Baby. Babe
Lord help me if I starve
If I could have just a moment of you
Would I be wanting more?
If I could have just a taste of you
Would I be addicted?
If I could have just a touch of you
Could I tear myself away?
I would pray to be the rain that runs over and in your skin
With no consequence
To be the liquid in your glass that falls around your lips and mouth
Swallow me
And after would the silence thicken, stiffen?
Would I run home in the dark with something stolen?
Would you be slinking in my conscience, laughing?
Would this hunger ever cease?
You are the cliff that I'm walking
Lord help me if I fall
Are you more than my hunger? Baby. Babe
Lord help me if I starve
If I could have just a taste of you
Would I be addicted?
LILMAN X
Lorna Vallings - Taste
If I could have just a moment of you
Would I be wanting more?
If I could have just a taste of you
Would I be addicted?
If I could have just a touch of you
Could I tear myself away?
I would pray to be the rain that runs over and in your skin
With no consequence
To be the liquid in your glass that falls around your lips and mouth
Swallow me
If I could have just a breath of you
Would you, could you infect me?
If I could have just a view of you
Would you leave your door ajar?
If I could have just a part of you
Let me drink of your tides
I would pray to be the rain that runs over and in your skin
With no consequence
To be the liquid in your glass that falls around your lips and mouth
Swallow me
And after would the silence thicken, stiffen?
Would I run home in the dark with something stolen?
Would you be slinking in my conscience, laughing?
Would this hunger ever cease?
You are the cliff that I'm walking
Lord help me if I fall
Are you more than my hunger?Baby. Babe
Lord help me if I starve
If I could have just a moment of you
Would I be wanting more?
If I could have just a taste of you
Would I be addicted?
If I could have just a touch of you
Could I tear myself away?
I would pray to be the rain that runs over and in your skin
With no consequence
To be the liquid in your glass that falls around your lips and mouth
Swallow me
And after would the silence thicken, stiffen?
Would I run home in the dark with something stolen?
Would you be slinking in my conscience, laughing?
Would this hunger ever cease?
You are the cliff that I'm walking
Lord help me if I fall
Are you more than my hunger? Baby. Babe
Lord help me if I starve
If I could have just a taste of you
Would I be addicted?
Monday, January 10, 2005
My tea's gone cold, I'm wondering why.. I got out of bed at all... The morning rain clouds up my window ...And I can't see at all ( Thinking...)
Well today I started school once again... Fun as always, same people, same teacher's, so on... I have Unix/Linux class, which I have been waiting for so I hope it should be fun... Funny thing the more school changes the more it all stayed the same. Oh yet once again my mind has gotten a grip on my thoughts, so I was thinking about that girl that I like (the one I met in club hell) and how could I have been so stupid to not let her know how I felt about her, I mean I was almost sure that I let her know I liked her and I wanted to go on a date with her or even get with her. Usually I make it a bit extreme and very obvious when I like some one but I don't know what the hell went wrong or were did I go wrong... Some times I sit and think about comments that she makes about guys and stuff and see how it could apply to me but I find it useless since she has a man at the moment and I haven't a chance or a prayer in sight... Well so I screwed up but hey I still haven't gotten over it... Why I don't know because usually I'm like well screw it I done fucked up but now I have this regret at times that I didn't make a move or make it obvious, this sucks because I think too much and analyze shit too much and this is major so I don't know how many entry's I will write about it but I give it a few more at least... I think about it like...Why did she come to my room when she was not supposed to be in club hell, but she came anyways to see me... Or just why, ok im going to drive you and myself crazy... I am going to sleep... Some Nyquill for my stuffy head and sleep until I wake up tomorrow...
LILMAN X
LILMAN X
Saturday, January 08, 2005
2005... Starts off with a bang a kick in the ass and other stupidity
Well from the Newyear's to now 2005 has been... Well shit and more shit sort-of. So my year started off like this... On new yr's eve a Cretan person decided to be stupid and ruin everything for everyone not because it was his fault but because he wanted to live in his little world so the consequences are that they pissed me off and that means they are on my probation for a month minimum if not more... All I wanted to do was to play halo2 and relax with a cup or red wine that I was enjoying a nice quiet everything, but since I have to be everyone's savior on this fucking hell of earth I have to intervene and destroy my happy evening because some one was a stupid mother-fucking selfish asshole dickless moron idiot fool who would of just admitted and said ok and I accept your apology and I was wrong too. SO YOU FUCKED EVERYTHING UP FOR EVERY ONE! So after I enjoyed that taste of acid going down my inside and eating everything up, yet another problem occurred but it was not too bad because I actually enjoy helping this person because I like her even though by helping her I am not helping myself to ever be anything than a friend to her but if she's happy I am happy for her and I don't mind being just a friend. Other problems that have happened are minor but still annoying especially this one problem with a friend of mine... Well it started off with just giving some one a ride to a place, ok fine no problem, I always love to help out people by giving them a ride because I know how it was to never have a car and not be able to get a ride... So there was a little more to then just giving two people a ride to a place there were four ok no problem... Well I always stay for a bit with the people that I give a ride to just to make sure there ok and they don't need to relocate to another place. Well so then things got complicated and I had to take them and 2 other people to another location fine. Well little did I know (BTW the other two were little girls, very young 3 and 4 I think) So as I am driving to this location they are in the back tareing up my back seat; messing with my pink bunny (Mr. Bunny-buttons) my pimp mobile light that I had connected and riged until they ripped it out of the seat and the lilmanx thing that joy made me... Oh and also some sand were in there shoes. Well fine upset a little bit but w/e just more work for me when I get home to but all that back in order, but what made me very mad was this person I was doing her a favor got really bitchy at me and I mean rude and all that I was like. WOW hold your self for a second, I did all this and put up with all this shit for you to tell me off... What kind of a mature person are you or say that you are if you are tossing a fit like a little girl... WTF... Anyways that was one event that I still cant figure out and she wont tell me anything about... W/e SE la ve... Now to talk about how much I feel like kicking my self in the ass for not going with my feelings. I spoke about liking a girl that I met yet agen at club hell but she was nice and I wanted or would of like to date and ask her out... Well now she has a man and its kind of late at this point so I was like wtf do I have to lose but to confess to her how I felt and still sorta feel.. So I did but what kills me is that I actually had a chance to get with this girl. I am 98% sure I did too. I mean what the hell was I thinking when I was actually lisening to that dumass who told me I had no chance with her... I know I have low selfesteam and just one person out of five telling me to ask her made me change my mind and so I didn't, but what a fool I am... Shit this sucks I had a chance and I blew it... Why did I ever actually pay attention to that fucking idiot ... He couldn't even get one for himself. I guess I just made a mistake and I will be kicking myself in the ass for that...
LILMANX
LILMANX
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