Changes, good, bad, and lots has happened...

Well its been a week since I wrote, but I have a good excuse this time... Right after I wrote last weeks blogg, I found out the hard way my car is dead... My lovely 1988 Toyota corolla died and I was soo sad because I know its old and kinda falling apart but I loved that car... She was so good to me... I miss her so much... Some good times I had in that car... But since she has passed away and is no longer working I had to get a new car... My current new but used car is a Red 97 Civic EX... Its awesome... And looks like new... I mean no kidding this car is in excellent condition because everything works, yeah its got a few broken things, but super minor and mostly cosmetic so its easily fixable... Also its a civic, what don't they cell for that car for real... I posted the pictures on my myspace so everyone can see, I want to know what people think about it... IM going to take some real good pictures of it soon because it was like the second day I had it when I took the pictures I posted and it was a rush thing... I know my friend's have told me they like my car so that's awesome because I car what they think well some times... Now I just have to find insurance and that's it IM done... 2marrow IM transferring the tag so we will see how that goes.... Well I will keep you informed... IM going to bed... Night...

LILMAN X

Bite me bitches I have been a busy man.. Lets play catch up!

Well so its been a month or so since I have written in this thing and I have done a lot and a lot has happened... Well lets see what I can remember... I have been partying like there's no 2marrow which is they way I like to think of life... And it has been super crazy because I have been trying to balance my friends from my social friends and my mind has been going crazy trying to please people all the damm time but hey... I am super man or at least I try to be and I solve every ones problems and I do get everything done at w/e it costs me, maybe because I am a nice guy or I just like to drive my self crazy... I was actually in the hospital since about from this past Sunday to Tuesday because me, as always never take care of my self at all and I was going down hill slowly but hey I stayed out a good bit... I did my best I guess you could say I haven't been in there since June so it was all good... Oh yeah big news... I no longer go to MCH (Miami children's hospital) anymore because, last time or I should say this time I tried to go in they rejected me and told me I was too old and that they made exceptions for me and that I must go to an adult hospital... So I was sick, felt like shit and I couldn't go to mch and my choices were go to doctors hospital or Southmiami... I was like hellz no I don't want any of them, so I got out AMA (against medical advice) and came home, called my doctor at Jackson and explained to him about what happened and man that guy was super cool about it... He hooked me up with a privet room at Jackson and grate doctors this time... I don't like Jackson at all, the staff sucks, the rooms ar horrible and the rest well I shouldn't say because I might get killed for it if I truly say what I feel but w/e... I would love to stay with him if possible because he is one of the best doctors I have had ever and he attends to me super fast because he knows when I call its bad... But I don't think I can do that... My ideal setting would be... Take my surgeon Dr. Wineburger, take Dr. Madanick My GI, Take Dr. Junquiera My general and best damm doctor I've ever had and keep them all with me, oh yeah and the transplant people too... But I cant I have to now get a new Primary general and a new GI doctor... This sucks but IM going to one of the best hospitals in Miami Baptist Hospital.. All my hospital buddies recommend it to me and think I should go there because they are super nice and will treat me like they did at mch or even better... So who knows... I hope it will all work out... IM sure it will... If not I will make it work... Well IM tired and I think I have some stuff to do so I will try to write I know some one reads this but I will post more often...

LILMAN X

Catch up time... Sleep? Board but not indifferent...

Well so its super late as hell.. I mean its like almost 5AM and I don't know why I cant sleep... Maybe, because I took a stupid nap during the day and I cant sleep now... Friday was awesome... Lala's b-day was the shit... SOHO lounge was awesome, Pilar, Lala, Fred, Carmen, Jenny, Amanda, and like 4 other people were all there... Wow SOHO has changed since I was there last time.. I haven't been there in hella long time... I like the way it looks now... Simple... My favorite thing is the 80's room... Old school hip hop and freestyle music... I love to dance to that stuff... I even had my glow sticks with me... Wow I was so loving it on Friday... SOHO has 3 rooms, one room is for hip hop, another for 80's, freestyle and oldschool hiphop beat-boys, and upstairs where they have a live rock band... The first live rock band was awesome... The rest ... Eh didn't do it for me... I had so much fun bugging jenny and her friend... Mostly jenny was the one I was bugging all the time, trying to get her shy ass to dance and shake it with another guy... The only guy she did dance with was gay but hey at least its progress... I was every where that night jumping from one room to another... What a night Friday was... I must do that once again soon...

Today was a chill day... Didn't do much at all actually... Well I did but my day is usually the night time... I did go to the CANES game vs Duke... Boy did we sweep the floor with them... But besides that nothing much happened... I was supposed to go to I/O lounge with some one but she decided to be a punk about it and was all wishywashy about it so I was like fuck it... Also my backup plan was to chill with my boy Fred and a few peeps but that didn't go down so I decided to pimp out my myspace a bit... I think it came out good... Well its late and IM going to put my car away and sleep now I am getting tired...

LILMAN X

NO REMORSE FOR THE WORLD!!! >_<

Well what a fucking crazy ass night I had... Shit... If it got any worse I would be in jail for killing a nigga... I have woken up today in a I don't give a fuck mood... Last night started off with just the most simplest plans... Chill at my crib install a few Operating systems on my bud's laptop and eat and chill at my home girls house... Well bullshit... The night was twisted as hell.. It all started off with both of us in kinda a pissed mood because well I don't know it was just that kind of night... So the damm Operating system did not want to install at all, the damm laptop was being super stupid... I mean what the hell, nothing I did worked... Ok fine, well if that wasn't bad we decided to go get some eats and head on over to my home girls house to chill, oh and before that several people were assholes on the road driving... Let me not even get started about driving during the day, and my damm teacher was not in class, we had some dude filling in for him because he got hurt the day before... W/e, so we wanted BK... Ok fine... So we get in the car and go to BK... As we wait at BK we see some car get infront of me and honk and then we get inline because I was the one first before they tried to cut me off... So they get behind me... And if that wasn't bad the damm person taking the order was pusshy as shit... Telling me hello are you ready yet every damm moment... I mean hello when I am damm good and ready to give you my order I will tell you... So we sed fuck it and left... As we leave the parking lot the same car that was behind me gets in front of me and then to the right side of my car and they are like what the fuck is your attitude... My friend gets like, What the fuck is your problem! So the dude sitting in the passenger seat gets out of the car and is like comming to my car... So I was like well fuck this I don't feel like busting a niggas head or getting arrested, So I peel out and say fuck you and leave... The best part was there was a few cops just chilling not to far from were we were probably seein this and didn't do shit... Well on top of that when I get to my home girls house I had low blood sugar and I get super pissed off when that happends so I was in a rather foul mood... Oh she wasn't in too good of a mood either, I guess she was moody because of some other shit but damm don't fuck with me when I am pissed off... Well w/e a lot of other shit happened last night too and I just don't feel like going into details but damm what a fucked up night... Just shit that happened that shouldn't of... So I say no remorse For the world... >_<

LILMAN X

Sick twisted relationships with bad week of sadness and suckubes...

Well what a shit week... Every one I know that was in a relationship, is now currently single... Wtf... The moon has turned into the 4th cycle of the Jupiter phase with the cat screaming in pain because he got run over... I don't know what is wrong with the world but I seem to be info central... W/e looks like IM not the one involved in this crazy phase of the stars... Well I am going to write probably some time tomorrow about what I need to do this weekend... Lets say it involves a lot of drinking, girls and party's ... Yeah! Anyways... I am out like a light that was smashed by the bat of the broken heart... Death to relationships the Alex reaper says!

LILMAN X

Writing the relationships away... This is not a good week for couples or relationships... Its been awhile

Well last time I wrote was simple and about fixing my computer and some dream I kept having... Well since then shit has gotten super complicated for a few people or actually more than a few people... More like almost everyone I know... Lets start by I think Friday or sat night I think... I got a call from a friend of mine that her B/F broke up with her because something happened with his moms that also he didn't love her anymore and bla bla bla... Well I care dearly for this girl, I mean she knows she can come to me at anytime to cry on my shoulder... Well she sure did, I felt so bad for her I just wanted to take it all away if I could... I did my best and I guess she is ok now... I know IM going to keep her busy so she wont think about him, IM sure that wont be a problem since I do like to distract my friends with my wild party life I live... Another friend that is having a problem with their "Girl" had just called me last night telling me how they messed up and now they don't know what to do... I haven't a clue how to help out on this one but IM sure it should get interesting later on this week... Problems have just been jumping out at me for solutions ever since about Thursday... Wow, what madness... I don't know what it is that people come at me for advise, what makes me so important and "smart" at this than anyone else? I mean I have my own problems too, but I don't really have many people to ask how to solve them but I do it on my own most of the time, also I don't tell anyone usually about them or I might ask 1 or 2 people for advice, mostly about the small things... I wish I was on the other end with "Relationship" problems or something because that would actually mean I was in a relationship... W/E, maybe I am meant to stay single so I can keep giving this awesome advise as I am told... This week was definitely not a good week at all for couples, Also hasn't been my week with girls too but that's another story I rather not tell... School started today, a new term for me... I got super lucky and at the same time not... I only have one class this term until the middle of November and its twice a week only, but I rather have 2 hard classes so I can get them out of the way... I feel as IM just doing the same thing over and over... Going to school, hanging out or a party or staying home... I think I need to add something else to my life, I don't know what but something is missing... I must clean up so I can find this missing part of the puzzle... Lets see have I left out anything... Talked about me being the psychologist, talked about school... umm... No I don't think so... I mean the only thing I do want to mention is I do miss a few people I haven't hung out with in a wile... I miss hanging out with colleen its been for ever since I've chilled with her... I also miss hanging out with jaws and Kevin, been forever since I hanged out with them too... Oh and I really miss hanging out with Gaby, I really miss her a lot. I know she is super busy with school and I don't want to disturb her with that because I know its super important for her, so IM laying way super low... I also miss hanging out in her house and talking to her dad, that's about the coolest Dad I have ever met in a long time, me and him could talk anything from computers to cars... Dads normally don't like me or just look at me funny because IM hanging out with there little girl but he loves hanging out with me and same goes for me, I also miss her mom, she is super sweet I love her fokes. Well its about 10:30 P.M. and my body hurts because I was stupid and forgot to get my stupid immunity shot for the last 4 days and I got it yesterday, so I am paying for it today... IM going to take a hot hot shower and grab something to munch on and toss a DVD or watch TV until I fall asleep... I have a lot of stuff to do 2marrow... I also must Finish fixing my PC so I can have my badass machine running once more...

LILMAN X

Mr fix it... Board on the rift... Music keeps playing...

So today I decided I was going to fix my stupid PC... Well damm the people at tiger... I got a 250GB hard drive... A Seagate too, and the fuking thing is dead... I tried every configuration I know and the stupid thing wont display... So its dead.. I can't believe my stupid luck... Damm this stupid idea of mines... W/e first thing 2marrow IM going to tiger and telling them a few things that I have in mind... Stupid people, why sell broken crap... Besides that I didn't do much today... I hit the mall with Luis because I was in my "Metro" mode and I felt like window shopping and I picked out some kick ass stuff... Some Prep because I want to start dressing prep once more and some rocker stuff too... IM kinda in between both so I don't know in which direction I should go... Oh October fest... How could I forget... Wow, What an awesome time I had... German Beer rules... Let me tell you, beer from the U.S. sucks ass, its like dirty water with stuff in it... Heineken, for get that crap, if you tell a German about that drink they will look at you like a fool... The beer that I had was awesome... And wow did I drink... I was happy I can tell you... Next time all I have to say is the Tank is coming home with me... Its been a calm day, nothing crazy or out of the ordinary happened... Well maybe one thing, every time I hear Dream Girl by Dave Matthews Band, I talk to a girl, or some one I have my "eye" on or something to that degree... I swear if I end up dreaming tonight... I just blame Julia Roberts and DMB and all the beautiful girls I know in life... Dammit get out of my head and stop messing with me... LOL ... J/K... Yeah lets just say this weekend the hunt is a foot! Onward Jim.. The Fox is getting away! Hopefully 2marrows event, I will be "happy" once more, just the day after that sucks, damm hangovers... Well I better go to bed if I am going to get up and do everything I have planed 2marrow...

LILMAN X

One part battery acid mixed with the books are fun...

Well let me tell you, I feel like my Brain is on something... Studying for my finals is not easy... I feel like I took some battery acid and put it inside my brain and just mixed it up with some stuff... Yeah headache for sure, body aches hellz yeah... Oh am I stressed... Fuk yeah I am... I must De-stress after Thursday because damm... I have been studying and making sure I know my shit so I can pass my finals... Thank god I have it super easy next term... This weekend... If I remember it I will be disappointed... I am going to, Drink like a mad man, Dance with the finest girls I can possibly find and just make sure its one big party... Because if I study this hard I have to party harder... Maybe I will get lucky too ... LOL J/k Naw I better be good or people are going to call me and be like what's this I was reading on your blogg.. W/e like anyone reads this... Well actually I get a lot of hits so who knows... Hey you don't like my party attitude... Join me, IM sure you'll just change your mind... Get you all crunked up and stuff... LOL ... Anyways now IM going to shower and study until about 4 A.M. or 5 then nap for like 2 hrs then school... Wish me luck and see if I can still write after IM done with finals >_<

LILMANX (On Book Acid)

He Who comes second comes last...

Well its the beginning of the week... Monday... Yay.. (yeah right)... Today I got my final review for Vincent security class and w/e I just have to cram it 2marrow and I will pass the final with no problem... 2marrow I get my review for Leo's class... I am not looking forward to that for sure... I know Leo and he is going to make it super, super hard... So that's going to kill me.. Eh... w/e I will pass it... Just do what I always do... Turn the cell off put up and awaymessige like leave me alone and I wont be bothered so I can cram my brain until I cant think anymore... No problem... >_< ... I swear i can never win... always second to last... I found out today our stupid school was not doing the ordering the books over the internet... Ok fine no problem they will provide us with the books... Well i gather my schedual for next term, F.Y.I. I only have one class monday's and wendsdays... So w/e I walk all the way to the other end of campus wich is far so i get there and found out they dont have the stupid book... I was like hello my class starts next monday, would you like me to pull the book out of my ass? So w/e the lady explains since the online thing didnt go they had to bring all the books and bla bla bla.. Well why the hell are all the books there except mine? WTF? i dont get it... So she told me we orderd them... A.K.A. next week sometime? W/e fuk them man for real... Also, What is it with girls lately... Every girl i know, and thats alot, is like treating me like second to none... i mean ok i dont ask for number 1 but shit... Remember me besides when you need to 1. talk about somthing to do with another guy... 2. Talk about how much your life sucks 3. talk about your love life 4. last but not least call me for a party or to see if i can entertain you... What the hell am i a phycologest and a party mixed with a personal entertainer? Common... Good greef... W/e im just sick of second to nothing, its like i try for number 1 but i get number 2... or if not last... good greef... monday, who knows whats next?

LILMAN X >_<

bu ba baaaddd..... >_<

Well so last night was super fun... After lollipop everyone knows IM always up for party time, so it was me Fred and 2 girls... So we met up at TU TU Tango, had some drinks then over to fat Tuesday's... More drinks and dancing... It was 1$ buds so I was a happy man... After that me and Fred hit the beach to check out a few places I was interested in checking out so that lasted till about 4:30 am... After that I slept for oh an hr or so got up had something to eat... Study for a test I had today and then got home and had a long long nap... Didn't do anything tonight because IM way too tired and now IM going to bed because I am sleeping in 2marrow... I feel extremely mischievous this weekend... soo who knows... Catch ya on the flip side... >_<

Llilman x

Were am I going but why is it all the same...

Well what did I do today... IM sore as hell but I do know the shutters are staying up.... NO way in hell I am taking them down if another hurricane is comings... I don't think this crap is over yet so w/e they are staying at least the ones that are clear the rest w/e ok I will take them down its just 3 windows... But no way... My arms, legs and back hurt like hell, and with no girl to give me a massage or say its ok fuk that even more... Well today I was thinking about how things change but they some how always stay the same... kinda like my life repeats its self or is in a loop of random but still some how its the same cycle .... w/e just wired things that are going on and I have to figure out... Some times I just want to pack up move out of Miami and maybe things will change but who knows... The way I see things they follow me or just stay the same, no matter how hard I try to change them or get out of the loop... This weekend IM going to do something that will get me out of the loop or keep me in them... Screw this IM tired of it... I need change or stability one of the above... But first before that party drink and be happy so w/e toss it to the wind and say screw it... IM taking 2 advil for my body aches and going to bed... Good night world of loopness...

LILMAN X

Ehh... My Head Hurts... Relaxed day...

Well today, didn't do jack... Too tired to do anything actually. I got home late last night from a privet party... Had a few drinks, watched a movie ect... I had a grate time... I think I will do this more often, its a good way to relax, even if they live super far away but hey what can I do about it... I think its worth the trip... Well I have a headache today, don't know if its from all the alcohol because I usually get them if I drink a bit too much, but I don't think I did... I mean I didn't even get tipsy or anything... Eh w/e... Fuk it I know IM not supposed to drink but w/e I don't care at the moment, I am in a eminem mood... (his song, I just don't give a Fu*k) because I am going to live it up this month and the next... After that I will be good... I miss my bad self, its been dormant too long... That side needs to come out and play some... >_< well im going to shower and sleep, even if its only 10pm

LILMAN X

TGIF... Who cares I worked my butt off...

Well so today is Friday or was actually now... I stayed home tonight to fix Luis's computer and also to fix mines... Well I got his all done the only problem now is I have to do my own PC... As many of you know I love my PC but since the hard drive crashed I haven't used it... So I just left it there in a corner to collect dust like a dead insect after its killed by poison... Well I have to get it up and running so my bad ass PC can be up and running once more 24/7 or close to it... Actually I did sorta work on it, well no I lie... I cleaned the "computer room" were I keep all my spare parts and other computer stuff... I found out I have a lot of parts... But the only problem is they are old... But hey its still good stuff... I say why trash working parts... Keep them you never know when you will need them... So today was not much stuff but wow... I am super tired from organizing that stuff... I wonder what IM going to do 2marrow... I want to go out or something... Maybe I will call some people up so I can party... Dammit I will go out and do something, I mean I just cant stay home all weekend working on my PC... Well I can, but I have done that way too many times... I am no longer a nerd... IM a nerd with a wild side... LOL ... Well IM going to finish up and maybe start on my PC... I might be up late... And lollipop 2marrow ... Maybe...

LILMAN X

Blink 182 - I miss you (for my PC)

Hello there, the angel from my nightmare
the shadow in the background of the morgue
the unsuspecting victim of darkness in the valley
we can live like Jack and Sally if we want
where you can always find me
we'll have Halloween on Christmas
and in the night we'll wish this never ends
we'll wish this never ends
(I miss you, miss you)
(I miss you, miss you)

Where are you and I'm so sorry
I cannot sleep, I cannot dream tonight
I need somebody and always
this sick strange darkness
comes creeping on so haunting every time
and as I stared I counted
webs from all the spiders
catching things and eating their insides
like indecision to call you
and hear your voice of treason
will you come home and stop this pain tonight
stop this pain tonight

Don't waste your time on me you're already
the voice inside my head
(I miss you, miss you)
don't waste your time on me you're already
the voice inside my head
(I miss you, miss you)
Don't waste your time on me you're already
the voice inside my head
(I miss you, miss you)
don't waste your time on me you're already
the voice inside my head
(I miss you, miss you)
(I miss you, miss you)
(I miss you, miss you)

What to do... What to do... Weekend is almost here

Well its another Thursday night... This time I didn't go out at all... Just came home and turned on the T.V. and watched E.R. It was the final episode were carter leaves and all that drama happends and stuff... I don't like the show with out him but who knows probably it will be the last season of the show IM sure... I mean common no originals left in the show so it must end... Today was fun... Class and some stuff I took care of... A lot of things have changed in the north west (were I get my PC parts from) but its still a cool place... Went to lollipop and had fun doing my dj thing... I saw Gaby tonight... Poor gaby, I mean she's not stressed but still I feel bad she's studying so so much... She trys so hard... I hope she will pass with flying colors... And soon too I miss spending time with her, but she has to do that school thing so she can get into med school and be a grate doc so she can be my under study and I can fully teach her everything I know about how to be a doctor and not just a doctor who just takes care of the sickness but who takes care of the humanbean... Very much different kind of doctors out there... Like I always say... You can treat an aliment but first treat the person before... Well hopefully soon I will get to hang with her... Although I think I spend the most time lately taking to her than any of her friends so I feel privileged... Well its late... Time for bed... Maybe... Weekend ... AKA PARTY!

LILMAN X

Sharper than sharp... Watch out I will make ya bleed... holla

Ok I don't know what is up with that subject line but I have been making shit up like that all day long... Like saying: watch out now because if you look at me your shades will shatter... LOL, ok so I am in a weird mood... A good mood I guess you could say... I do feel better, maybe what I needed was a good rest and relaxing... Well I did relax, more than I usually do, so w/e... Chilled out to the max I am, so here I go to the bathroom to relax to the max... LOL... Ok so I am really out of no were in a good mood... Something good must happen eventually... Because why would I be going insane in the membrane... LOL... Ok for real, I did some home work, oh and I talked to roxy today... Been a wile since we have chatted.. It was good talking to her... She's kinda like my guide to my problems, she sets me str8 most of the time... Anyways... Like I sed before, I must run to the room to relax to the max and chillaxs until the candle wax is gone to the end of the buring wick, so just like that im out like a flash... PEACE >_<

LILMAN X

I Feel like crap, Checked out, what's going on?

Well today I just felt like shit in class... I woke up super late to leo's class and when I got there I just felt like being in bed... I don't know what the hell is wrong with me... Something but I don't know what... Usually IM better at self-diagnosis than the small minded doctors I know, except for the one's who know my case; well but this time me and them both are stuck on what's wrong with me... Odd... I know I feel drained... So I had my blood count checked out today... Its fine a bit low but nothing I can't handle or need to go to the hospital for... So maybe its the cold that is comming back? I know I have an infection somewhere because my blood count is all over the place... Where I have no clue... I think what I should do 2marrow is stay home and relax... Maybe since I am stressed and I feel like crap and maybe everything has come all at once its got me down... Maybe a good day of relaxing and doing everything I have to do to take care of my self 100% will make me feel better... I mean I cant take care of my self to 100% every day... I have to live and do stuff and its impossible to do everything and take care of my self 100%, I figure 90% is fine... I guess that 10% adds up slowly and catches my ass in the end... W/e... On another note... I talked to almost everyone by now... Found out peeps were just busy doing stuff and taking care of things... The only one I haven't talked to (at least on the phone) is gaby... I would tell you that I don't miss her voice or I don't miss hanging out with her, but we both know I would be lieing out of my ass... Right? I know she is super busy with school so I just want let her bee and when shies not busy I know she will call me.. Or at least I hope she would... I have been calling her and chilling with her a lot lately (which I love) but I have to let her be and she had to do her thing... Compared to what I do every day shies super busy, I live it busy too but not as much... More like busy with other things besides school... School is cake for me, Computers; its my thing and I could teach the class if I wanted to... Actually sometimes I do correct the teachers but they actually like that sometimes because we get into the "correct" ways to do things... Maybe this weekend comming up I might ask her to do something... ( hope she reads this )... Well people.. I don't know who reads this stuff but I just write... I think IM going to take a shower and watch something on T.V. until I fall asleep... Probably not until late if I know my self...

LILMAN X

Another day...

Well... Lets see, what can I say about today... First of all I didn't feel like getting out of bed this morning... IM not sure why... I have a lot of lack of energy lately, not sure why, actually I lie... I have an idea why the thing is I am just avoiding it... Avoiding the inevitable but w/e... Besides that nothing has happened today, just another day for me... Boring and uneventful... I hope 2marrow is more exciting because I just hate days with nothing happening... No one called me, I spoke to no one, did nothing... W/e Its 9:30 going to bed...

LILMAN X

Where is everyone>? Hellloooo... Anyone out there?

Well today was a quiet day I guess you could say... I spoke to no one, No one called me... I wonder if people moved to another plant or something... I usually get calls from people every day to say hi or what's up or how are you, but today was just like if everyone was gone or missing... The only one who showed up was Luis... Luis came over today and chilled at my house until about 9... I showed him the titanic kariokie place... He liked it but the odd part was none of my friends were there.... No javi, no pilar, mari, Lucy even that Goth dude... Odd... The only thing that did happen that was awesome was I saw this girl who I haven't seen in years... Her name is Veronica, wow I was taken back... At first I felt super bad about it because I couldn't put the face to the name... I knew that I met her before somewhere because I never forget a face but I couldn't remember her name or were exactly I met her... It took me a wile but as soon as I remembered I was like OMG... I admit I screwed up, she was an awesome friend and things just got weird between us... My problem was I didn't know what I wanted at that moment and I was kinda still searching for my self in what I wanted and stuff but, now is when I have my shit straight... I gave her my Myspace name and my phone number so I hope she calls... I would love to have her as my friend once more... At least this time I wont screw up and I know who my true friends are after the cutting of the evil and bad influences in my life... I do have to admit, I did cut a lot of bad out even if I didn't realize it until I was in bad waters... Now I just have people I can trust and good friends... Well if anyone is out there, please contact me to at least know the outside world is still alive... Kinda makes me sad in a way no one called me or at least told me hi today... W/e guess people were busy...

LILMAN X

Home Base Relaxing

So today was a good day... Relaxing I could say, I didn't go anywhere or do much... I did do radio lollipop this morning but only because I knew a few people were going to be out and I was going to help out my home girl pillar... So that was chill and after that I saw Dio for a few, haven't seen him in a wile and chilled at alien's house for a bit... That was about it... It did rain for a wile here but it was the calm rain that just hits your window with a soft noise on the roof as it falls down onto the ground... A noise I do enjoy some times when IM in my calm moods... I love that sound of water with just a hint of lightning with out the thunder noise and violence in it... Just a sweet game of the Angles playing in the clouds that sets off some lights as the earth Refreshes its self... Well I think IM going to finish here and get something sweet to eat before I go to bed and toss on a Anime and watch it and sleep... Maybe I wont set the alarm 2marrow, just get up when I get up... I leave you with some lyrics... Oh and check out the Video to the right, its awesome... Let me know if you cant see it

LILMAN X


(Sarah McLachlan - Angel)

Spend all your time waiting
For that second chance
For a break that would make it okay
There’s always one reason To feel not good enough
And it’s hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
Oh beautiful release
Memory seeps from my veins
Let me be empty And weightless and maybe
I’ll find some peace tonight
In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You’re in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there
So tired of the straight line
And everywhere you turn
There’s vultures and thieves at your back
And the storm keeps on twisting
You keep on building the lie
That you make up for all that you lack
It don’t make no difference
Escaping one last time
It’s easier to believe; in this sweet madness
oh This glorious sadness that brings me to my knees
In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You’re in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there
You’re in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here

Two-thousand eight hundred and eighty minutes later... >_<

Well its today and I still haven't slept at all... I don't know how I have done this but w/e I did... Maybe it was all the caffeine in me or just the hype that kept me up all this time but I didn't sleep at all last night... After I wrote I was like well I could sleep for 2 hrs or so but I figured screw it... Why bother... So I just got something to eat and chilled in bed watching TV until I pretended to get up, So my parents wont be pissed that I didn't sleep at all, took a shower and got my stuff for school together and bounced... I got to school early today... So I did my bit of studying done, so that's out of the way until Sunday I still have a paper to write and some worksheet on converting Hex into binary and bla bla bla... So tonight I wanted to go out so bad... But no one wanted to go out... What losers... I wish I would of gone out anywhere... I hate staying home, especially when I haven't slept and IM delirious and hyper... That's the best time to do stuff because its like your floating and don't feel a thing, until the next day... Besides that it was a calm day, took care of a few things here and there... So w/e I think that's about it... Since I am home its like 10:30 I think IM just going to go to bed or chill there for a bit until my body says.. Sleep and I crash and fall asleep with out notice... This happends when you don't sleep for Two-thousand eight hundred and eighty minutes ( Figure it out)... Plans for the weekend... Don't know up in the Air I guess ... Well IM taking my butt to the shower and bed... But not before I put away the bat-mobile in the bat-cave...

LILMAN X (delirious) >_<

Sleep is but a word on my crazy days...

So I just got home like all of 5 mins ago... I was out chilling with Fred and marcina all night long... dammm, what was I thinking... I have school at 9 am but I get up like at 6 or 7 to study before class so... Yeah IM crazy, I think I have a test too but w/e I don't know how I do it but I sure do... I say party like rock stars... Wow what a party it was awesome, first we were at some Pub(English bar) which was by the way grate because it was a chill spot... Calm not to many people so we just chilled at a booth, oh yeah I behaved my self and didn't drink anything alcoholic... I had a plain diet coke because some one might kill me otherwise... After that we went to Mr moe's to chill some more... I didn't drink also, tempted so much but no just another diet coke so like after 2 more I was wired and I had to dance so I took marcina out to dance cuz shies my dancing girl LOL and I was doing my thing and I had like an audience looking at me so I gave a little show and I just bounced to this one guy who was looking and stuff and I was like oh go dance with her, her name is marcina, so I hooked her up and just slipped on out of the dance floor to sit for a bit, actually the rest of the night... I just was enjoying the music and people, chilling with Fred... So that's about it... Lets see I woke up at 6am its now almost 4 so yeah I think I will get 2 hrs of sleep... Maybe and then 2marrow... Who knows...

LILMAN X

Feeling better but still some shibby left around.... Ideas problems and solutions...

Well Today I felt better, honestly I thought I was going to wake up and be all screwd up. I guess some how I fixed myself.? Weird I know but hey, IM not asking how or why... The only problem was a killer Headache I had all day and it just got worse from the morning until about 3pm when I took a nap, it got a bit better but I also added the element of advil and other stuff to fix it... So it helped... I haven't spoken to anyone in a few days... J, jj or alaine... Odd I wonder why... Possibly they are pissed off because of Sunday? W/e they will come around, I just wanted to be with out the crew for a bit that day, its just everyday and no time for myself to enjoy the company of some one else... Speaking of someone, I haven't spoken to them since about Monday, I texted this person and I think I left a message but I haven't talked talk to them over the phone... I bet they are busy with lots of stuff... I think it might be a super busy week for them... I miss their voice.... On another note, School is going good.. Getting excellent grades but w/e I always do because computers is my thing.... I need to start working out more, different things besides jogging... I need a work out buddy or something... I hate working out alone I feel like a loser doing it by my self, that and I need some one to push me and I will do the same... I have to do something about my car soon... I keep telling my mom and dad I need either a new(used) car or paint and fix my brakes and other stuff that's wrong with that car... The way I see it IM better off getting a diff car because its just getting too expensive fixing up that car... That car needs: New pipe for exhaust, New brakes, Paint job, Fix up the interior ( because it looks nasty), a tune up, my system is shot because my amp is shot, one of the speakers I keep having to fix, my neon lights are shot, my fog-lights are disconnected and broken... So I think getting another ride is worth it... We will see what happends... If not screw it I drive my car until its death... Today I was looking at my financial ascetic's, in between Studying and Jogging... I noticed my system of getting income and stuff is not going to last if gas prices and other prices keep rising so IM going to first ask Jorge at school if I can get in back with them as student work study, If not IM going to go job hunting around here, anything, but it must be easy and part time.... w/e I still have plenty of time to look... I have plenty to last me this month and the next to splurge so IM cool... Well IM going to go organize my books and charge my electronic stuff... I think this weekend I will work on my PC there is an awsome deal at tigerdirect with a 250GB hard drive and I also have to buy a cover for my phone ... So much to do...*closes the notebook and puts it back on the shelf*

LILMAN X

Feeling sick and shibby... Must win the fight... (sigh)

I don't feel well at all... I woke up today late for class, I almost fell asleep in class to add to everything... It was like something str8 up from a NyQuil commercial... I was all stuffy and nasally and all crappy... On top of that I felt sick to my stomach and had a killer headache... I came home like around 1:30 because my stupid teacher out of all days decided to keep talking crap like always on the one day I felt like leaving early... What crap, I should of left but w/e I stayed tied to my chair like if it was thorns holding me down as I couldn't leave... When you feel sick like that people take my advice... Leave don't be stupid like me and stay because you want to be a good student... Hell he gave me a 90 for class participation... What bullshit I felt like crap, I mean he was lucky I was there... w/e... So we lost the game to F.S.U. The game was awesome... I was screaming and all, F.S.U. Played good, I think they deserve the victory (this time)... Oh yeah and I didn't go out yesterday too, which I was not happy about but w/e IM used to disappointments... Well IM going to take some NyQuil and go lay in bed until about 1, I cant miss my programs at midnight after that I will sleep... I HAD A BAD DAY.... All I have to say is Fuel- (had a) bad day Change all the words that have she and her and girl stuff to guy stuff and that's my song for the day... GOOD NIGHT

(sick) LILMAN X

GO CANES! / sorta shibby / Had lots of fun

Well its that time of the year, When I bring out my Larry coker Scrubs out and put them on under my jeans wile the canes play... Woot we are going to win you'll see... Today is the game V.S F.S.U and we will win, IM confident in the canes, Miami can do it! Well I Still have this cold I guess you can call it, and it has me a bit run down but IM doing just fine I think... Some other "people" noticed I was not feeling good but I know they care about me and that's why they tell me... Oh my complicated life I live... Too many things I want to do in one day and so many accomplishments I want to get done but I just don't have the time or energy any more to do them... I didn't sleep well at all last night... Thinking about stuff that worries me and stuff that I have to get done the next day and tasks I have to do... So many things, yet I would only ask for 5 main accomplishments 2 priority first and the others can be done. Its just not easy being me, I guess its my own fault I complicate my self... I think I deserve a good kick in the ass some times for setting such stupid goals and accomplishments I know are almost impossible but, I guess that's the war I fight everyday with my self and with my mind... Thinkers are not easy people... We have it easy from another person's view but we like to over think and perfect things until they are done right or done perfect... w/e enough about that... I know I haven't been feeling well and that's one of my many worries... I don't want to go down hill once more... I CANT, I think I will just lose it because everything is going almost perfect... IM going to school, hanging out with people, Chilling with Gaby... I don't want to go back to club hell, I don't wanna end up back on leave of absence and get away from my studies, I don't wanna miss out on going out with people, and who would want a loser stuck in club hell, I also wouldn't be able to get in shape... Damm this body of mine, why the fuk is it just being an asshole to me... I mean I do everything I can except for sleep and when I do it still screws me... I don't get it, IM taking medication, eating right, doing everything so wtf.... The worst part is I know it and I feel it but IM fighting it as much as I can, I know when people start telling me IM not looking good its gotten me because I can hide it super well and usually I win but IM just winning this round I think.. Maybe I still can win but ayyy... What a battle... Last night was fun, Gaby is always a pleasure to hang out with... She always makes my days better no matter how shibby I feel or w/e its like me + me... LOL... She's so beautiful and funny, and super smart... Her best quality is she is always honest and open with me, yeah she tells me the truth when IM being stupid, you all know I do this a lot... I like to put on a dammit face or a ok w/e face and I know it bothers the hell out of her but I love that reaction... Weird thing is we don't argue, at all now that I think of it... I don't know if that's healthy or a good thing...? Moments I have with her, I wish I could take a black magical pouch and take that moment in time and convert it into a Gem; that I could put inside the magical pouch and save it. So I can take it out later and look at the gem once more... I actually wrote a poem about it... Share it you say? Maybe, you all know I write poems but I haven't been inspired in a long long time to write one, maybe 3 yrs or so since I have actually wrote one... I hope she enjoys her self also, she's not to verbal, I guess I am more than her... Well enough about Gaby... Im sure Who ever is reading this is like what a loser... Eh bite me if you think that... Well the game is going to start soon so I am going to do something... What I have no clue... BUT DAMMIT IM GOING OUT!!! (i doubt it)

LILMAN X

Sniff... Sniff... Class today and WOOT I got an 85 !

Well today Friday I had class with Leo so w/e. We had to make up for the hurricane and stuff because my school is super strict on days we miss due to anything, so they figure Fridays in as make up days they have 7 or 8 of them for a term... So I studied last night until about oh I would say 3 maybe and I just was at a point I was thinking in binary damm I don't even remember most of it... I was all fuked up.. So w/e the test was super awesome thanks to late night cramming but I got an 85 so IM super happy with that grade... So far in the class I have a 4.0, and its going to stay like that! This term no messing around, or w/e this class is b/s stuff. Except maybe for Vincent's class, hes super easy and the class is cake... So today I chilled with jj, j, mike(aka luda) carlos, tiff, joy and mike and his girl Elaine... We were going to go to a southwest Miami SR high game (my old high school) but it was canceled because of rain and too muddy... I was going to get all my gear from when I was in high school too... My southwest t-shirt my megaphone, my purple stuff and everything... So w/e we ended up going to bird bowl to play some pool and maximum tuning( racing game) well they played that I rather play pool my fav past time.. So that was cool and then we just chilled after that for a bit and that's about it not much to say today... Mostly I wanted to go out and relax and forget about school and stuff so I had fun today.... I talked a little with Gaby too (always brightens up my day further) and now its bed time...

LILMAN X

delirious.....delirious.....delirious....

Wow all i have been doing for the last 2days is studying and more studying... Damm leo's class is not easy at all... The worst part is im in his class with out taking cisco... I mean i dont know how to subnet or conver binary or hex... Errr... what luck i have... I can deal with it... I mean i didnt get tested for an I.Q. test for nothing and got like borderline genius.. So i can do it its just my A.D.D. and my mind starts to wonder other places... I start thinking about what i have to do the next day, what i want to do and other stuff thats floating around in my head... Well... i got back from lollipop today, got to see gaby wich is always awsome, had fun with the kids... I love to cheer them up and thats about it... Since i got home i have been reading and i got like 4 chapters out of my way so i should be fine... I feel like my eyes are going to bleed, my head is going to jump out and blow up in my face or im going to pull my hairs out and screem as im pounding my face into some wall so i can pass out and maybe relax mentaly... No... that wont work thats just going to give me problems later... Eh (sigh) Well i def have to do somthing this weekend so untill 12:59 noon 2marrow i am a busy man after that i will study but not as much... i need to relax! i need to go out! i need to party!! i need.... stop being so- delirious delirious delirious delirious!!

LILMAN X

School with Brain Stew and I don't give a crap what time it is....

BLAST!!! Is all I have to say... Damm I have been a busy busy boy today... Damm... I just cant get over all the stuff I have done today... Wow talk about playing the Tech roll all day long... Well so I started my day off at 7 AM if not earlier I think because the sun was not out yet but it wasn't dark so... I got up took a shower went to school because I know staying home was pointless because I would end up back in bed so I decided to go study... So as IM sitting eating my empanada reading chapter 1, 2 and 3 Ximena called me to see what I was up to and I was like well class hasn't started and IM here studying. So I asked her if like later I could meet up with her to study or w/e and she was like fine... So w/e class was good because I have Vincent and he's easy so I just relaxed as much as I could in class and then we had some stupid project to do about, viruses, trojans, and script kittys... w/e easy but we had to do it in power point and he told up well take it home and bring it back next class... I was like hellz no im going to do it right now until class is done so I can turn it in and be done with it... So I did and it came out awesome too with all kind of animation and graphics and it only took me like 20 mins to do in total most of it was taken up looking up the info on the net so basically cake... After that Luis called me to fix his PC because it was broken and I told him his next day off I would help him so I did and he came over... I thought it would be something simple or w/e but no, never... When is anything I do with computers fast and easy, Rare or almost never... So yeah new mother-board and reinstall windows and all kind of stuff... What a pain, I mean I don't mind doing it, just the actual computer being a pain in my ass... Oh yeah and inbetween fixing luis's computer my grandmother called me saying her satellite was not working.. Wonderful, so I head out to Flagler and 60 something and I was like ok w/e I need to go that ways to pick up a mother-board for luis's computer... Well I get there and she's all pissed because I was like wtf you expect me to dump what IM doing and fly over here because you cant watch TV too well I mean, HELLO you do have cable after all... So the problem was the positioning of the damm dish its self after one hour of figuring out stuff. So I did my best and I left, picked up a mother board and came back here to get the computer and go to luis's house... Ok well So windows didn't want to install so back over to my house to get a special program to save his files and wipe clean and reinstall fresh copy... By that time it was like 10 or so... Windows takes about an hr more or less not counting on moving files that he needed to save... Well did that and had to call Pakistan (California) to speak with Rob (bullshit) so I could say yes I need a product key and this is the only copy of windows I have installed on here and no other machine... What a bunch of crap acting all American with that damm fake accent... Oh I also talked to hottie for a few, at least that made my day because I swear my day has not been the best after playing tech all day and dealing with stuff... Well so after luis left I was studying a little bit because I have LEO 2marrow.. FUN! (hang me please) So I hope 2marrow go's good because I need a good day... Oh yeah a bunch of crap my school is the next 3 or 4 Fridays I have class thanks to all the days we missed... Dammit... Well I think I should get some sleep because I have to get up at 7 or 6:30 so I can finish studying some... Oh yeah yesterday I whent on date #2 with hottie and it was awesome.. Maybe I will write about it but I dunno depends if my day is complicated or not if I have time bla bla bla ... Well so that's it and... Error!!#@#!@$#%@#%100100111000000110000011000000110 Error.....

LILMAN X >_< error....

Crashing...AHH... and burning... AHHH... And yet you would still think I would Sit still !!

Well all I have to say in the famous words of Green day... I am a walking Contradiction... Yes I feel semi shibby(shitty) Yes I have been doing hard labor in my back yard cutting trees, Yes I Should be in bed relaxing... But am I....................................? NO! Why because I never learn my lesson... Yes that's right for the one reading this and knows me, you ask why aren't you in bed, why aren't you relaxing, sitting back and taking good care of your self so you don't end up back in club hell... Well all I have to say is... I Love you :) But I am a hard head... Only way to keep me there is one.. Keep on my ass and make sure I am, very little people do that.. Two, threat me with I will never do anything with you and I will be eternally pissed off at you, or three... Tie me down or know my weak spot... HA not too many people know that one... (looks around)..... So my day... Lets see, cutting trees, cutting trees, oh yeah band-aid's... umm cutting and hulling some more trees... And food... Oh tonight is kariokie at tavern so yeah looks like IM going to that... And lets see anything else.. Oh I miss hottie.. Its been a wile since I've seen her... I wonder if she misses me too...?... I love hanging around her, and just being around her makes me so happy because I think we both entertain each other... Like most girls I like usually just Sit there and I have to be the entertainer or they just don't like my (semi crazy mix) friends... Actually they just don't like them, but she loves hanging out with them, and that means a lot for me... Another thing is that she understands a lot about me and were I come from and my health problems which is a lot and a super big deal for me, most girls run when I tell them, I mean yeah its a lot but I don't expect them to run just semi understand.. Hottie just understands 100% and is totally cool with it, so that's 25% there... She is super, super book-smart... I love a nerd at heart... I am one too, sorta but more undercover... ( well not anymore now that you've read this) I love her smile, her smile is like a light of sunshine on my face in a field of flowers in spring time with that hint of flower smell in the air.. (cheers me up) Her attitude is excellent, especially for me who has such a pessimistic look towards everything, but IM trying to improve for her (and me too)... I have something real special planed for her soon... I was going to do it sooner but thanks to this stupid hurricane that messed everyone up I had to delay it... Hopefully everything will be just right when IM done... Well we will see... I just hope her heart is into it and is thinking clearly... (Yes I want your full attention) Good now that I have it, btw its at 8pm Tuesday night and later desert... So lets see oh its time to be eating and going out... Catch me if you can... HAHAH~!!!

LILMAN X

Storm, Recovery and power, feeling a bit better somewhat...

Wow The last 24 almost 48 hrs has been crazy... I thought that hurricane was going to be this little crap... hellz no i was way way wrong... My back yard is a mess, total mess actualy... I just got power about an hr ago so it was like 27 hrs total with out power... What a nightmare... The little shed we have in the back got smashed by this big pine tree... So yeah i did a lot of landscapeing today... Eh... i knew i shouldent of but i had to help out my dad some what... We also had a genarator so i also had to keep an eye on that too so that i mostly tryed to do since i was feeling kinda ok but still shibby.... Oh yeah i tryed and tryed to get my money back for the green day concert but i didnt feel like going and you would think with a disastor like this they would be like ok yeah no problem... Yeah right no way in hell they would give me my money back so i thoguht of people to tak and almost everyone couldnt go because of duh the problems caused by this stupid strom... so i finally called marcina and she was like yeah sure no problem... so she was the only one able to go... i would of loved to take hottie but she couldent go... Wow what devistation there was ... I mean trees down power lines down o mean total losses i dont even know plans for 2marrow... I would like to just sleep in and forget the rest but we will see... i dont also want to get sick, but i have to do what i have to do, be a man and i guess just bite it and take it... Or i can just laydown and try too feel better, between cutting and the concert i am beat... Im just going to make it short tonight i will have more 2 say im sure 2marrow or another day ... so just look at some pics of the devistation in my back yard and tell me what you think...

LILMAN X

School, Here, Not Feeling 100%, WTF HURRICANE

Well so today I was at school, duh its a weekday I go to school other wise im a bum... Or my mom would kick my ass one of the above... So w/e I stayed awake in Vincent's class because anyone that has had him knows that yeah he talks and talks and bla bla bla even when I try to amuse myself by participating and some times coming up with conflicting dictions... Cuz anyone that knows me knows im a smart ass, lol... So w/e there was that, oh Yeah im not feeling too well, but w/e im dealing with it... I don't know if any of my friends have noticed it, been going on since like Sunday more or less but w/e, anyone who knows me, can tell and the rest I hide it from them so no one will know but w/e hopefully it will pass soon... I was happy yesterday because I got to see hottie, not for long but I had to return later that day to see her because I love spending time with her, even for a little bit I am happy... I love to hear her voice, and when she corrects me, which she often dose (I don't mind) I pretend to be frustrated... Some times I really am but its good to have some one keep me in check. She keeps me on the ball and shies sharp about stuff so I really can't fool her (most of the time) :)... (love you). I Guess things are going good with her I would say I haven't gotten any indications otherwise so... I would hope she would be honest and tell me because I know I would do the same for her... Actually I have been since the day that I met her... Which is unusual because im not really secure with people for a little wile but shies different... Oh yeah... WHERE DID THIS FU*KING HURRICANE COME FROM? I mean I don't mind it because they canceled classes for school 2marrow and Friday but it still might ruin other plans that I have... Also I don't feel like putting up shutters or putting up the protectors in the bat cave so my car is protected... Too much work... It was just supposed to be a little rain some wind and boom done... No the damm thing had to turn and say " Yeah its miami's turn now Bitch" W/e ... If its not bad im going out and having fun... You know... Well lets see anything else I would like to add... Nope... Look behind you... HURRY!
LILMAN X
P.S Made you look >_<

Much to think about and back to school..>_<

Well its Monday and IM once agein in school and this sucks... My classes are boring and point less... I hate theese classes because its about secturity... Big deal I do this all the time when I set up a PC... I always lock my pcs down tight but w/e... Oh yeah I saw Sofia and " my replacement" the dude who took my position when I got sick and had to leave.... Hes ok but w/e I think I did more but w/e... I want to ask for my job back because I could use the $$ so I can keep my assets level and not have to work double to replace for my investments but w/e I guess I will have to do the same thing I always do... So yeah same shit different day.... Well so a lot of stuff has been going on... Mostly my time has been spending time with someone... This "someone" who will remain nameless, is the most wonderful person that I have met in a long long time... They are truly genuine... Its incredible there are still people on this earth that still think like that... Most people I have found to be materialistic or more interested in superficial things... Ok so I don't make this super confusing lets give this some one a temporary name: hottie, obviously its a girl for most of you that know I talk a lot about my girl problem here but w/e I know this person might read this but I have nothing to hide... Well hottie is awesome... She is almost perfect but there are a few things that bother me about her... I wont say what but if she reads this maybe she can figure it out(CLASS IS ENDING CONTINUE WHEN I GET HOME 11:50).... Ok well IM home now.. So I will continue... I am and have always been the hopeless romantic... Its just my nature, I don't know if its I love to love, or I want to just have a special some one, but w/e I think hottie is the mose beautiful person I have met in a long long time, not only physically is she beautiful but also spiritually and personality wise. She's just the most cheerful, happy, positive, sweet, honest,loving, big hearted girl that just looks for the right things in people and never judges people by looks or by anything that other people from this walk of life assume... I really hope and pray that life is good to her because there are such evil and cold people it this world that love to look for the innocent and big hearted people and ruin there mentality so that it changes there way of being... I know, because I used to be a lot like her... I know I have a lot of anger and IM like aggressive because I feel the need to defend myself because first my size and second because I was hurt real bad a few times before because of a person that was cold and it changed my mentality a lot... I was very loving and never saw anything wrong with anyone then after my experience I did become more aggressive, but when IM with hottie; I want to still be my spiffy self but I don't feel the need to because I can feel the good from her and I am more calm. I really do like her. Love>? Love is a strong word and I don't like to use it much because I used to use it a lot but yes I do have intentions to love her but I don't wanna say it... I know I am attached to her and I tried and tried to not be but, my "hard shell" that I developed from being Screwd over has broken and I personally thought it would take along time for me to find some one I care about which is kind of true because it has been3 yrs but I think I am starting to care once agein... I know She cares about me and I know she is attached but she has her doubts or just is not ready to ecknolege it but I wish she wouldn't fight that feeling... Maybe she will come around eventually one day... Soon or a wile from now... Will I be hurt from her not coming around now? No not really yeah I will feel something but I am a strong person, I have dealt with worse, but I have a good feeling about her... Only time will tell... I just hope she wont ignore me or distance her self from me because... 1 she's read this and it scared her... 2 she hates me because I am trying to make her realise she cares and to stop fighting her self on that issue.. I know what it is to be free and to want to date around but when a match is good and you know that person is genuine you should Listen To Your Heart..

LILMAN X

4am no sleep...

Its like 4 am and I cant sleep... blast me and my wonderful brain... I hate this high I.Q. b/s, it drives you mad when you have a problem to solve or an issue or something on your mind your brain wont let you sleep at all... I hate that but what can I do... Well today I helped a friend move in to the U.M. Doarms and it was awesome, now they have a place all to them selfs, well not really im sure they will have a room mate but hell it couldn't be too bad... At least this person is closer to me than before when I had to drive like hell to go to there house... I had lots of fun today is about all I can say... I also would like to add the keys don't fit under the door anymore but lets not even go there... I have found there is trust and there is Trust, What trust I don't know but im sure curious who or why would some one trust some one so much and feel so comfterbale with them if they have only known them a short time, and also given the knowledge of the past they have had but know they have learned from them yet they still trust... Its funny how some people are innocent minded like that but hey, I hope they are strong willed or at least strong at heart to make the right choices. I have done a study once again. I have noticed when people are trying to live differently from there ordinary lifes they change habits and also change there thoughts... But the contrary part of this is in them truly deep inside they astray and want to be changed back to the way they were.. Now theory If they are pushed back into that loop is it because they decited to go with it or because of pressure?... Well thats just my thoughts for now... oh yeah i didnt write about my Date... WEll thats another time, i guess youll just have to keep on checking up...

LILMAN X

Cant Sleep, TOO NERVIOUS

Well its like 3 am... gee... lets see i got home around 2:30 was in bed and i couldent sleep... Well why must you ask i couldent sleep ... Could be that i have a date 2marrow who i really like but i have no clue in hell if they like me back or even if they see this as a "date" date, you know what i mean? Well also i mean i havent done this in a long time... i mean come on who am i kidding i mean, since like at least 2 yrs so w/e i just dont remeber what to do or im temporarly forgeting what to do... ( sigh) ... Who knows if im like blowing this up more than it is... I mean im confident and stuff... Yeah, right.. as much as a chicken in a KFC farm is of being eaten... I wish i was as confident as i want to be its just rejection that worries me the most.. see i dont usaly say it but what the hell who cares, i will say it this time... I mean katie and a few others told me she looked like she was intrested so who knows, maybe its just me thinking stuff up. Well w/e im going to attempt to sleep i do have to go and take care of some stuff befor the date.. movie and dave and busters so it should be good... Well... HERES TO AN ULCER and a good time :) >_< (ahh)

LILMAN X

Sleep no more under the tech....

Well today was calm compared to yesterday or I should say the day before today "Friday". Gaby asked me to go fix her PC and wow I was expecting a old Pentium 3 or w/e but hey at least she had windows XP and it was like a 1.8 with 512 ram.. So w/e it works cuz god knows ive pulled crazy shit with a slower computer so w/e cake!... So I just saved all her files and stuff to a portable HD I have and then wiped her system clean... So it was simple... Her dad was there the entire time I was at her house fixing her computer which was fine by me but kinda got a little bit but just a little too much of him there but w/e it was cool I talked to him about cars and computers and the stock market so it was awesome... Oh me and gaby, well she invited so I was like awesome, it was a long time since I was at that place I love that place so w/e it was awesome me her and abunch of her friends, so yeah I had my time with gaby but not alone but hey... I couldn't ask for more because I have a date with her on Monday.... Yeah my stomach started freaking out on me i got all messed up when she was like yes sure... i hate that my body always gets bent out of shape and stuff when im super nerviouse... w/e... So i must figure out were i should take her but i have all day 2marrow to do so and kariokie so im going to bed or at least try because i know im not going to get any sleep thinking about monday...

LILMAN X

PS... WOOOOOOOOHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

Crash and BURN! and other stuff....

Well... So i was a little bit right about Crash and burn... Boy did i ever crash and burn... i know its been along time since i wrote so lets see if i can remeber all that happend... I had to take another leave of abcence from school because i ended up in the hospital... What happend was i had a bad cold so we tryed to treat it here at home with arisol and antibiotics so it wouldent turn into nemonea, well alot of good that did i ended up taking a antibiotic called Biaxcen... Ook fine it took all that bad conjestion away but... When it took all that crap away it triggered my stupid Crohn's attack... you know its like, if its not one thing its another... Well so w/e that happend and i had to go into the hospital so we can play the "lets see how we calm the flarup" game... Bla bla bla medication later fine i was out by the end of jun, well since i had to be out of school all that time i (almost sure) lost my job, well maybe not but since i am not in school i cant work because its a student work study program, so w/e a grate job paying $10 an hr so i could do 30 hrs a week and get a nice paycheck bi weekely... w/e so thats gone to hell... Girls... well 1,2,3,4... gone... i am only trying to talk to one because that was driving me crazy and the person that was supposed to come to miami to visit me... CAN'T, so that whent to hell too... Now im just trying to take it easy... Ook B/S who am i kidding, ive been going out alot with my [pop Crew] if you know who they are then good you know most of it, if not ask me... Its been fun hanging out with them because its and older and younger group and at least we are doing stuff i love to do... EX: Partys clubs, Bars, Dancing and so on... i also still hang with the hood team.. AKA julian, jj, j, Xec, carlos and the rest of the crew. So yeah i still go out alot but i so so want to go back to school i feel as im wasting away at my brain and just taking in stuff thats not going to get me intelectualy challanging... I was thinking today about turning on my pc because i have been useing my parents ever since that hard drive died on me and i lost all my pics and some files i think... w/e i guess i will just have to rebuild from scratch... or i will contact ramon and see if he still has my HD... i doubt it and i doubt he fixed it too like he told me but hey maybe i will get lucky... with all the bad luck i have had i might just win this one but you know me i am always a pesamist... now a change of subject... as all of you know i write and alot is about the other sex... GIRLS.... Well here is my delema wich im sure it will change by the next time i write... There is this girl i like.. well ok w/e 2 of them i really like the rest i dont care about... Now Girl 1 is always busy and she kinda lives far but she is a grate student and i really havent been able to hang out with her outside of school but i have like once or twice now girl 2 I also like maybe because i met her not too long ago but w/e shes awsome... super smart and wow what a figure bit tall but so are most of the girls ive always gone out with or w/e... So Now girl 1 i knowen for longer but i dont know if she is going to hang out with me as much as girl 2 can (i think) so im not sure what to do also i havent talked to girl 1 in a long time( 4 days) but i talk alot with girl 2.. SO... yeah my brain is friyed... Well maybe i will find my self some way to pre occupie my self some other way... Well thats about all i have to write about... I dont think anything else exciting has happend.. but hey who knows school starts AUG 22 and i will try to get my job back... "try"

LILMAN X
Oh yeah check out myspace http://www.myspace.com/lilmanx

The crazy life i live... i do but i don't want it....

Well since about last Wednesday shit has been crazy.... good and bad too, the only way to describe it is that it’s been nuts... between work and school and going out to party and trying to have a life is not easy... Wednesday was awesome because Kevin told me about a club called the morgue... no its not were dead people go, but gothic people and rocker people and also all kind of people from all walks of life ... except ghetto peeps... no thugs or wannabes allowed... but it was awesome... I met a girl named Heather there... kind of sexy girl... something about her I don't know what it was but it was like a turn on... could of been the entire gothic look and stuff about her... I def must go again... I loved the music... it was like kind of a euro trance mixed with hard rock mix... The best part was when I was telling heather about my days as a raver and she pulled out 2 LED lights and I was like in love... I was so happy so I went out on the floor and started to rave like I used to back in the old days... I was so tripping out and having a blast it was awesome... after that basically the week was calm until Sunday night.... Sunday night was really crazy because I was supposed to go out with genine to like a club but what ended up happening is that I was hanging out with jj, j, Julian, russle and the rest of the crew... well what happened was that around 9:30 or 10 I got a call from Ximena that Caro was having complications with the pregnancy and it was at Jackson hospital... So I took jj and julian with me to Jackson and we ended up getting pulled over by some asshole cop that thought I jacked my own car and told us to put our hands up, what bullshit that was... I mean they told us to put our hands up and turn the car off and get out of the car all because they thought my car was stolen... stupid asshole cops... Yesterday we were taking some people home again in the northwest area... well since j is always driving joy's car and she knows about it this time the cops saw us dropping off some people at there complex and stopped us... after they stopped us they almost arrested j because his license was suspended and they asked me to drive the car home... imagine me I look like I’m a kid to drive the car home, well it wasn’t bad but I couldn’t see well so it was hard driving the civic all the way in the northwest to southwest it was a crazy drive but it was awesome because the civic had like hand controls sort of like trip tonic stuff… so yeah I took it all the way to my house and then j drove it home I guess… well that was about it …. My situation with the ladies well shit what I can say… SHIT… nothing… no girl wants me and time hates me… I have not time to go any ware or do anything anymore and the girls my friends hang around with all jail bait (underage) so yeah I’m screwed… girl 1, 2, 3, 4 well I haven’t been able to do shit about it because I have no time to do anything or spend time with them to at least show them something about me or get to know them better… life is so hard and I wish it was easier…. All I just want is a girl, be able to relax and be normal… no hectic life of rushing here and making time to relax or enjoy myself and fit everyone into my schedule... everyone seems to have time but me… I’m always trying to squeeze my life other peoples life sleep and school all in to a 16 hr day and get like 4-5 hrs of sleep and do it all over again… crazy shit but w/e that’s my life and I guess something must change or I’m going to burn out before I get what I want…..

The madness just don't stop... shits just crazy and i don't wanna deal with it...

What a week so far and its only monday... Since Wenday of last week shit has just been crazy... everything is just like going out of hand... w/e its late and i will write about it 2marrow morning... lets just say shit can't get any crazyer....

LILMAN X

Well what a weekend it was, good... i mean all i did was sorta party and hang and chill and relax.... carolina's baby shower was this weekend and i got her some awsome carrieing thing there for the baby since i know her and she is always on the go... so besides that i was doing the usal, fat tuesday's with dio and peeps... which is getting kinda old, but im sure its not the last time that we will be going there.... Girls are starting to get to me... deeeply... i don't get them.... some of them play mind games and some are straght out with you about what they want... it seems like the only ones i want are the ones playing mind games or maybe im just bad at transalting what they want to say from there own lingo called FEM.... I thought my friends have showed me the Female lingo but i guess i failed that class... maybe i need to have my gay bestfriend next to me at all times so he can tell me what they are truely saying...lol... Well basicly whats wrong with me is i like a couple of girls... problem is i need to figure out who is right and wrong for me...lets give them names.. Girl 1, Girl 2, and Girl 3. two of the girls i dont know that well as much as i would like to get to know them and Girl 3 i don't know if she even likes me or has an interest in her... I know Girl 1 and Girl 3 longer than Girl 2, but the problem is i really like Girl 3 because i have known her longer and i also know the do's and don'ts which is important... Girl 2 i see almost every other day but i really don't know much about her and i would like to get to know her at least somewhat... Girl 1 i dont see much of or at all but i will soon and Girl 3 i also dont see much but thats because i have to drive kinda far to hang out with but soon she will also be neair me too so... what a delema.... I have no clue what to do but w/e i guess i will just go with what ever happends first...

LILMAN X

A week has passed... Scars

Well so its been a crazy hecktic week-last week and this week is starting iffy, first of all i dont feel well at all, but i am doing my best to do what i have to do. Last week was crazy at work.. lots of stuff happend, i almost erased the stupid computer that has all the info that we copy to all the computers in the school because of my " CO- WORKER'" but w/e it sliped her mind and my boss didnt get that pissed off, but it can be fixed, well the weekend was good sorta, i wanted to do alot like get the lights that me and Dio got at the junk-yard but of course nothing happends like it should so that didn't happen at all... instead we just did an oil change on his truck and whent to the grove to fat-tuesdays and we were supposed to go to Los-olas and have fun but nooooo!!! We all gatherd up way to late to drive 1 hr out of miami to go to broward. Well fat-tuesdays was fun sorta because Dio saw some people he know and they were there chilling with a bunch of girls so w/e i got my fair share of danceing and grinding in with them... The only bad part was that he kept bitching and bitching like a wineing little punk about how he made reservations at rusty pellican and this girl didnt call him back and he didnt get her why she didnt call him and bla bla bla... so i did a simple solution... >_< i got him nice and trashed :) ... and also set him up with the girl who knew how to dance, the dirtyiset.. lol ... besides that nothing really much happend this weekend... oh friday i was russhing like a loonatic to go see my friend in her prom dress.. she looked awsome and i was so proud of her.... she didnt take a date so i didnt have to worry about the after prom factor... (if you dont know what the after prom factor is use your imagination) I havent been online in such a long time i havent had the time or anything... i miss talking to my online friends and most of all roxy... hope she is doing ok... well hopfuly i will be online soon... as soon as i get some free time to work on my pc... Well back to work...

LILMAN X

This song is like my new theam...

I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut
My weakness is that I care too much
And my scars remind me that the past is real
I tear my heart open just to feel
I'm Drunk and I'm feeling down
And I just wanna be alone
I'm pissed 'cause you came around
Why don't you just go home?
'Cause I channeled all your pain
And I can't help you fix yourself
You're making me insane
All I can say is...

I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut
And my weakness is that I care too much
And our scars remind us that the past is real
I tear my heart open just to feel
I tried to help you once
Against my own advice
I saw you going down
But you never realized
That you're drowning in the water
So I offered you my hand
Compassion's in my nature
Tonight is our last stand

I'm drunk and I'm feeling down
And I just wanna be alone
You shoulda' never come around
Why don't you just go home? '
Cause you're drowning in the water
And I tried to grab your hand
I left my heart open
But you didn't understand
But you didn't understand

Go fix yourself

I can't help you fix yourself
But at least I can say I tried
I'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own life
I can't help you fix yourself
But at least I can say I tried
I'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own life

[Chorus x2]

I took her out It was a friday night... CRAZY WEEKEND...

So yeah what a weekend i had, i think i havent gone partying like that in a long time... Thursday Friday and Sat... I think the people at phat Tuesday's know me by now... Oh small correction on my priviouse blogg The girls i listed is by order, the numbers dont mean the amount of girls but in the order i have met them... Ok back to the weekend story... Well so basicly it was 3 str8 days of party after party after party... I whent with Dio and the tall skinny venesolano out to Fat Tuedays ... It was so awsome i had so much fun... i havent had that much fun in a long time.... I will write more later on in the week about it...

LILMAN X

What a long Week...

Well its been about a week since i have last wrote, and it sure has been hecktic... Work has been harsh... i sure havent been feeling 100% or even like 90% but everyone that knows me i always look 100% even when i feel like 40% power of what i should be... Well today was crazy and last night was awsome too... i was chilling with my new homie Dio and we decited to go to Fat-tuesdays, bar/clubish chill place, and it was good i met 2 girls one from Germany and the other from Oman, somewhere way the hell out in the middle east accourding to her, go figure, last time i was at a club or someplace like it i met this girl that lives exactly on the other side of the world... wonder who it is...? >_< how i would love to hang out with this girl and get to know her but they all seem to just live on oppiset sides of the world... just my luck... lets see a small list of girls that i have met that don't live im miami; 1 Girl from tennessee, 2 Girl from panama, 3. girl from colombia, 4. girl from peru, 5. girl from lebanon, now add german girl and the other one from way out there and lets not forget the semi-crazy girl i knew from canada( who i dont speak to) so yeah... not one from miami or at least the same state... Good greef well screw it, i guess other cultures like this El cubano... Tonight i am going out agen even if i do or dont feel good so who knows what a crazy night this will be... hey maybe i will go way east and maybe japan or china? i doubt it but hey who knows... well Eat, Iorn cloths, shower, shave, and get dressed all pimped out to go out tonight...

LILMAN X

Roxy, hope to see you soon sorry i havent been online its been
CARAZY

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!!!... anotherday .... weekend over

BLAST!... Its sunday and the weekend is almost over... Well it was good weekend so far, kinda busy but awsome... Friday was a casual chill day at my house mostly but it was relaxing, Sat was awsome i did alot of stuff on Sat. My morning started off with a radio lollipop semi-anual training wich was awsome then after that i whent to a picnic which my school had for everyone. It was fun but no big deal because the only people i chilled was a few peeps i knew from school and that was about it... After that i was hanging with Dio and we were at some chicks house and we were helping her move in to some new house there so we played Mr. fix it guys ...AKA (bitchies) and did what handy house work was needed... after that i whent to target to get my mom her card for mothers day and after that i was supposed to go to a club with Dio but i was so tierd from doing the handy bitch job that i was im not going to stay out late.... Well so i call Dio and hes like everyone is tierd so forget it im staying home, so i meet up with Terrell and Luis at BK and chill for a bit then i bounced to jj's house to drop off the network cable i made him and to have him come with me a sec to Dio's house to pick up some blackbarrys we need to hack and j, julian, and tiffany end up going with us... well so this quick chill with the crew lasted up to about 4am more or less, we ended up looking for people to race in j's car and eating shit blasting some fire crackers and of course everyone that knows me knows what happends when alex is sleep deprived... ( I GO CRAZY) so as we are eating shit tossing fire crackers out the window wile driving i hang out the window with julian hanging on to my paints and im screeming to people we pass or who ever on the stree.... ( " Hey Im Coco Loco man, you dont know me, im crazy, my moms afraid of me... and so is my dog man" with a wierd mexican phyco acent) so yeah that was the crazy Sat i had yesterday... I got up today at... 12 and now i am on my way to my grandmothers house and i have to go to terrells house And later, get my power locks and windows kit...so this should be a rather... more relaxed day.... i hope... hell who knows....

LILMANX X

Roxy please stay safe and becarful... i worrie about you alot...
sorry i missed you online, but well you can tell why...
miss ya

Rain...semi-kinda better sick....

Well so i didn't go to school today at all, actualy i called in sick and stayed home... i had no choice, since now im all into school hard core and i also have a job and i am making mad money i wanted to go but i felt too shitty to go... so i slept most of the day untill about 3 when i got up and decited to go online for most of the day, kinda hopeing some one would go on... but oh well it was cut short anyways because around 5 a nasty thunderstorm came and i didnt want my electronics to fry so i turned everything off, and tryed to sleep... everyone who knows me, knows i hate thunder since i was kinda struck by lightning and my fear of electricity due to it being attracted to me... go figure, i cant get a woman but electricity loves me...>_<>_< ..... anyways..... i have this song stuck in my head all day long... its by the killers, its called Mr. Brightside... Love the lyrics i want the album... i will aquier it... soon... Well its getting late and im going to bed... School and work... then the weekend... WOOT!

LILMAN X

The Killers - Mr. Brightside

I'm coming out of my cage
And I’ve been doing just fine
Gotta gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss
Now I’m falling asleep
And she’s calling a cab
While he’s having a smoke
And she’s taking a drag
Now they’re going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it’s all in my head
But she’s touching his—chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, let me go
I just can’t look its killing me
And taking control
Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Swimming through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it’s just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
‘Cause I’m Mr Brightside

1x repeat

I never...I never...I never...

I'm not sick, but I'm not well part 2

Im sick, but i know at least i can fight it, a simple but anoying cold is what i have... I hate being all stuffy... I was so happy to check my email today in class, i got cards from roxy... it made my day to see she sent me somthing... i miss talking to her online... i want nothing more than to fic my stupid pc and be online 24/7... its been a hell of a bitch to get online in the last few weeks since my pc is down and i dont want to use my parents since they keep telling me to fix mines... its just that the studpid western-digital HD i have i cant do anything untill that guy gives it back to me and i can RMA it so i can get a new one and rebuild my PC Empier..... well im feeling crappy so i am going to take something and go to bed early... i will get rid of this damm cold... i will write more 2marrow if class is slow...

LILMAN X

Roxy i miss you but i will find a way to talk
to you online some how soon...

I'm not sick, but I'm not well

im sick

Don't waste your time on me your already the voice inside my head, I miss you... "thoughts"

Well so i got up a bit late this morning, not my usal up at 6am and out by 6:40 or 7. but w/e i didnt sleep last night much because i had a lot of stuff on my mind like relationships and stuff like that... Its been a wile since i have had a girlfriend or a girl to call my own, i feel like im left out in the cold when i see all my friends with there girls having fun and enjoying eachothers company... what i enjoy about it is not the physical or emotional connection but more like having some one i can talk to and tell my deep feelings and thoughts to... ive tryed looking but being me is not easy because i have a few challenges i have to over come befor i can have them be my girl... first challenge is i must be attracted to them some how... since im no built up muscle man i have to charm them and talk to them which actualy takes alot out of me mentaly... then after i over come that i have to find out if they like me and exactly how... as a firend as a possible b/f and so on... after that major challenge which i beleave is my biggest and hardest one to acomplish because even if i look like i have no fear and show no fear i feel so scared to be shot down but its not even that its that some times i just feel inferior to other good looking guys who get hot chicks and they are such assholes to the girls and here i am a nice guy somewhat good looking and i get put off to the side for a bigger looking piece of meat... (sigh) but what can i do, i just want some one who cares about me and i can connect with... thats mostly what has been on my mind lately... On a diffrent subject its been an ok day, i had a test and i passes it with an 83% so i got an awsome grade... well its like 11:30 and i am in class so im going to stop writing about my stupiditys and pay some attention... i work all day till 8 so yay fun for me...

LILMAN X

this song reminds me of my loveless love life...


Blink-182 lyrics
Song: I Miss You Lyrics

(I miss you, miss you)
Hello there the angel from my nightmare
The shadow in backround of the morgue
The unsespecting victim of darkness in the valley
We can live like Jack and Sally if we want
Where you can always find me
And we'll have Halloween on Christmas
And in the night we'll wish this never ends We'll wish this never end

Where are you and I'm so sorry
I cannot sleep I cannot dream tonight
I need somebody and always
This sick strange darkness comes creeping on so haunting everytime
And as I stared I counted the webs from all the spider
scatching things and eating their insides
Like indecision to call youAnd hear your voice of treason
Will you come home and stop this pain tonightstop this pain tonight

Don't waste your time on me your already the voice inside my head

I miss you miss you

Screwed, Pissed off, drowning...

Well this weekend was ok... but kinda sucked. My brand new 200GB hd craped out on me on sunday... i was sitting at home and i transferd some info over to it and i had to leave because i got a call that a friend of mine had a problem with there computer so i come home around midnight and when i get there i hear a clicking sound... well it turned out to be the clicking sound of doom .... the hd died on me or is dieing on my... i asked a few teachers at school what i can do to recover the data.... one told me im screwd one told me im safe for a few and one told me to try some soft ware so we will see what happends ... i miss talking to roxy... i wonder how she is doing and if she misses me ... i know i miss her... i just want my pc fixed and ready to go... soon i will have it fixed and done ... i have to, well its time to go to work... if its a slow day i will come back and write more if not.. there is always 2marrow...

LILMAN X

Catch me if you can

Well so its been a busy week and its also been good too ... I love my job its super awsome and chill like, because i mean its easy for me because i know it and the material and stuff so its cool beacuse gorge is awsome... i love it because we all work togeather and coaparate as a team... Sofia is awsome... bit i would say moody or even pusshy but she is cool and i dont mind it, since i am used to it from doris( who i havent seen in years... but hey shes from newyork so its cool... i talked to roxy the other day and she loved the E-cards i sent her, since her school was giving her a hard time i thought it would be nice to cheer her up. i know what it is to be all stressed out becuase of school... just 2.5 months and we can hang out. since i have no one to spend my money on or just dont have firends to go out clubbing like i used to i can just save and spend later ... :) eh ... who am i kidding i am cheep, j/k.. gotta go to work .. write later

LILMAN X

Harsh days and work work work....

Wow it seems since i started working i havent had time for my self at all since like sunday. Its been super crazy because i am trying to do everything i can possible but im squeezing in hrs in my 24hr life... I am trying to do my max 30hrs so i can get payed my full paycheck.. well like my mom told me its money that i am getting in now that i didnt have befor... so i guess she is right.. i want to go out and relax like i did but hey i dont care i am getting payed and i guess i will save up for the weekends.... Time is but the past ... write more when i get a chance

LILMAN X

Another night another day and it will always be...

So its been a wile since i have written in my blogg... i know i am bad about writing in here it just has been one crazy week... Well first thing is first... i took my A+ exam, failed; but not by much... at least 2 stupid questions but w/e its a stupid test and i now know whats on it so w/e, it will be easyer next time. So w/e dissapointed about that but the best news of all is that i got a job! I work at my school with the head M.I.S. guy george, he is so cool i make my own HRs i work 30 hrs a week wich is part time and i get payed $10 an hr so i think thats damm good. So basicly at work all i do is fix pc's, network printers and do maintanince on what needs fixing and mess around with Patch5 cable to connect pcs to... So thats about all i can think of right now... im kinda burnt out from the crazy week i have had so i am going to sleep as much as i can... Roxy i miss you alot and i want to talk to you, soon i will have some free time, soon... hope your ok ...

LILMAN X

Freedom of the brain, or at least untill sunday....

Ok so my pc has been screwd for the past week... well shit it anit my fault... so my video card blew out... well more like was there and fried it self to a death basicly... the fan is not working at all and the basterds at MSI didnt want to replace it cuz its out of warranty... well so i got a good 3 years out of it... would of been nice just a little bit longer but w/e.... I might start working at FCC (school) part time wich would be cool because i get EXP and i gain a little more info on the way the school works but, who cares because i do know most of the dirty doos there so w/e... but it will be $$$ comming in... YAY FOR THAT... i dont know what i am going to spend my paycheck on but i will save i will tell you that.. i mean what expences do i have .... fule, eating out like Mc'eds and stuff like that .... depending on how much i get a week i will have the following by may : PSP, NEON or LED underglow on my car, and other little stuff on my car... Well wishful thinking... but hey i do have the moon in somthing or w/e lol i know how to spend basicly my astro chart tells me... so anyways i am going to bed because i need to get up early to help out katia... fun .... Who knows when i will fix my pc... maybe after i take my A+ core exam... no worries untill sunday... party party, and more party... :)

LILMAN X

ps roxy i miss talking to you but as soon as the madness passes i will contact you

HELP ME FROM MY SEMI-Charmed kinda life

Well what a day or 2 days its been it has sure been crazy.... Broken pc, mostly its my video card thats all screwed up and i need to buy a new one but w/e my moms getting for me... so today i had to go to school and i had to make up alot of work and now i just want to go home and relax but i cant because i have to still go home get stuff and katia has not called me and this is the last week of the fair... i feel like screaming and going crazy and i cant... but anyways i am going to go to luis class do his make up work and stuff and i also have to schedual stuff for my A+... I AM GOING CRAZY! so what now... roxy im sorry i havent been online but i have alot of stuff to do... just please do me a favor and check this site as much as you can to keep in contact with you...

LILMAN X......... >_< crazy

Computer is down for the time... Sigh >_<

Well today so sucked... i mean i was haveing a good night last night and i came home and my pc whent screwy ... i think my video card is screwd so i have to replace it.... i mean its only 3 years old and it shouldent be acting up like this... i installed some old cheepy card for the time being but i think the O.S. (operating system, windows xp) is all messed up and im going to have to reinstall it all over agen... well i guess what i might as well do is add a few new things like maby a new controller card for all my hard drives and i will finish sorting out all the junk that i have.... well its super late and i am super tierd and it sure has been along day so i am going to bed.... by thursday my pc should be up and running... (i hope)


LILMAN X

Roxy if i am not online dont worrie just email me or somthing
untill i can chat with you on msn