Well the month of May so far is like a Whirlpool that sucked me into a unknown world... April was no better because i just don't know anymore what is going on in my life i guess you could say... the damnedest thing is that i was so happy with everything too before like mid April i would say... everything was the best it has ever been in my life. The year started off wonderful and perfect, then i had some drama and issues with my health and a lot of other bad shit happened but i haven't complained at all because i always talk about all the shit and bla bla bla but i never did. why because i was happy. i had it all i guess you could say. i had a girl who loved me ( i think ) and was by my side and just about supported me in every aspect. my friends were fine and i didn't have to go rescue anyone or any other bullshit or drama which every one knows always is an issue in my life but even that had no problem in my life... now... I feel as i am lost, or are in another world or just in an odd place. it all was fine and from one week to the next... poof i guess you could say all the shit blew up in my face and changed. its all changed for the bad. so i don't know if its something i did, or it just something that was building up to change on me or i don't even know what to think anymore... W/e I just feel lost... Pissed off and sad and upset and emotional and angry and something i just cant describe all into one emotion... i have no words. i have no thoughts. The worst part about loosing your mind in the matter of a way is.... I CAN'T DO SHIT ABOUT IT!!!... AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
LILMAN X
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